there's a downside on everything

Lately I've been feeling exhausted. I'm tired of constantly moving and not building my life. Sometimes I feel like I'm just wasting time. When all your plans get cancelled and you think it would be so much easier back home. When you can just go without planning and always find someone who has time for you. I miss having my own apartment, my own home. I'm in control of everything there and no one is there if I don't want them to be. I've got my beautiful furniture and comfy bed and everything is clean. I don't have to worry about coldness inside or bugs crawling around.

Might sound superficial or materialistic, but I miss my stuff! I miss my mermaid blanket, my waffle iron, my fluffy cushions and my alarm clock that wakes me up with light instead a noise. I miss peace and quiet. I miss certain foods, foods I never thought I'd miss. Then I think again and I understand, I have the rest of my life to build a home. To feel safe, cozy and warm. I will appreciate all these daily things so much more when I finally go back. But hey, surely I'll get sick of all that pretty quickly again. Then I have time to think all the things I miss in Australia. A perfect weather 90% of the time, beautiful nature, bikinis, BBQ's, beaches and the SUN. I'll always miss the sun. 

Despite working constantly I've managed to do some cool stuff too. Yesterday I did a bushwalk and the other week I went to see the 7- mile beach. It's autumn here in Australia so no more swimming for me. I had this summer's last bikini shoot last Tuesday as well. It sure was cold!

I was supposed to have my 3- week holiday in NZ from 3th of May but cause of my work I couldn't go. Next time I'm able to go, it's going to be October but that's fine too. As long as I know it's coming.

Before I left Finland, I felt stuck. Everyday seemed the same and it felt like my life is going nowhere and I had no idea what to do. When I visited Finland, all those feelings were gone. I felt free and I loved it.

The truth is, routine is routine in every country and we all need a holiday every now and then.
Some of us have 2 weeks in Spain and some of us 2 years in Australia.